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Scarlett’s back, Jessica’s back and HC is back October 17, 2006

Posted by holdencaulfield in Amber Tamblyn, Ashlee Simpson, Entertainment, Jessica Simpson, Madonna, Scarlett Johansson.
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So as you may have noticed, I haven’t posted in a couple weeks.  Some of you may call me a slacker, some a lazy jackass.  And to tell the truth, I’m a little of both.  But in my own defense, you really shouldn’t expect any less from a guy who writes a blog about trashy celebrities, occasionally during work hours.  

— My girl Scarlett had a couple revealing articles in the last couple weeks that I couldn’t pass up.  First in Allure she said that  

“Contrary to popular belief, I’m not promiscuous.” 

Popular belief?  I thought the general thought on Scarlett was that she was pretty much the “good girl with fantastic cans” surrounded by Hollywood tramps Paris and Lindsay Lohan.  But maybe I was wrong. 

She goes on to get my hopes up by saying

“I’m not a serial monogamist” and “I do think on some basic level we are animals, and by instinct we kind of breed accordingly.” 

She finishes the article off discussing that she is tested for STDs and HIV twice a year.  Not quite sure why she threw that out there though, unless she’s just trying to look like a responsible adult.  Or maybe she just wants to ease the minds of everyone who’s been dreaming of being Benicio del Toro and having a steamy rendevous with her in the Chateau Marmont elevator.  Whatever it is, I’m happy she cleared that up for all of us.

The latest on Scarlett comes from filmmaker Michael Bay who told Esquire that

“Scarlett said, ‘I’m not wearing this [expletive] bra. I’m going naked.’ I said, ‘Scarlett, you can’t go naked, this film is PG13.'”

Wha, wha, WHAT????  Are you F’ing kidding me?  She WANTED to take her bra off and you denied America this?  Are you some kind of commie?  Maybe Michael Bay should go back to blowing shit up and I’ll handle when beautiful women want to take their clothes off.  Can we all agree on that? 

scarlett_johansson_bare_breasts_5_big.jpg

 — I guess the Simpson girls took some time off from being photographed by their creepy-ass dad to show off their bras and matching noses the last couple of weeks.

Well, Ashlee showed her bra

ashlee_simpson_bra_6.jpg     ashlee_simpson_bra_3.jpg

And Jessica showed some bra and a little more… 

jessica_simpson_bra_exposed_big.jpg     jessica_simpson_bra_exposed_2_big.jpg     jessica_simpson_bra_exposed_3_big.jpg    

864-js114.jpg     865-js120.jpg     866-js118.jpg     869-js117.jpg

Now I know you have all seen these fantastic jugs before, but I can’t ever pass up a chance to see this rack.  Even if her hair is a little f’d up.  And she makes out with her gay hairdresser.  And she misses Nick Lachey’s poser tattoos. 

 — I’m sure you all heard that Madonna is using all of her celebrity status, fake British accent and cone bras to adopt some African kid.  I don’t know if she can speak in clicks already or plans on learning, but what the hell is behind this?  Is she trying to compete with hot dog lips herself, Angelina Jolie?  Give it up Madonna, you’re done.  Adopting poor kids from other countries may sound all glamorous but it really isn’t.  Trust me, I know.  Last time I was at the beach, I adopted a hermit crab and boy was he a son-of-a-bitch.  Sometimes you just can’t please everyone. 

 — Some chick named Amber Tamblyn let her nipple loose a couple days ago.  Honestly, I had no idea who she was, but apparently she’s done great work including starring in Joan of Arcadia and The Grudge 2.  Really though, who cares.  We’ve seen her nipple now, so no need to go to the movies to be teased out of that.

amber_tamblyn_nipple_slip.jpg

 — And lastly, how can you pass up a video with Bikini Bull Riding?

If you don’t like it, you’re gay…or blind….or dead…

HC

Comments»

1. Serg G. - February 3, 2007

Hey guys!
What do you think that Scarlett Johansson (actress) actually is a clone from original person, which has nothing with acting career. That clone was created illegally using stolen biological material. Original person is very nice (not damn sexy), most important – CHRISTIAN young lady!
——————————————————-
I’ll tell you guys more, that clones (it’s not only one) made in GERMANY – world leader manufacturer of humans clones, to be more specific, it is in Ludwigshafen am Rhein, North Bavaria, Mr. Helmut Kohl home town. You can not even imaging the scale of the cloning activity. But warning! Helmut Kohl clone staff 100% controlling all their clones spreading around the world, they are very accurate with that, some of them are still NAZI type disciplined and mind controlled clones, so be careful get close with clones you will be controlled as well. Think wise..
Thank you!
Her close friend Sergei G.
P.S.
H.R. 534, the Human Cloning Prohibition Act of 2003, was introduced to the U.S. House of Representatives on February 5, 2003. After discussion, it was passed on February 27 by a vote of 241-155. It now moves on to the Senate for consideration. This bill makes it unlawful for any person or entity to perform or participate in human cloning, or to ship or receive embryos produced by human cloning. The penalties are imprisonment of up to 10 years and fines of $1 million or more.

2. junaid zahik - May 20, 2011

u r so bad bcz not have fuul sexey images


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